Everything In It’s Time

Today is very warm. It’s been nice only because the nights have been cool. It’s when the nights stay in the high 70s or even the low 80s F. that it is difficult. So far the forecast shows cool nights but very warm days, approaching 100 degrees.

I don’t like having to sleep with the air conditioner on. Right now I can keep it off all day while I’m at work then turn it on for about 3 hours until sunset and then it stays cool. Then I can sleep in the coolness without having the air conditioner running, which is expensive.

So many things are changing for me so quickly. I’m just going along for the ride. It’s like I went through a decompression period from the journey and now I’m going back to living a “normal” life. Normal for me.

I really like it so far. I don’t think too much about things. Lately all I’ve been watching are animated movies and tennis. I started watching a live action movie and it looked strange because I’ve been watching only animated movies.

Animated movies are entertaining with light propaganda. I tried to watch WALL-E but I didn’t really get into it. I actually fell asleep about 10 minutes in and slept a long time. This was during the day yesterday. Maybe I have become a bit tired from sleeping only 5 or 6 hours a night the previous weeks. I then slept a full night last night.

I figure whatever sleep I get is what I will have to use each day. I’m not going to try to control it. If I sleep little then I will use that extra time for myself. If I sleep a full night then I will accept that. It’s not like I’m always tired in the day, now that I’m working the same hours each day for the most part. I still go to bed at the same time each night. I do my part.

I tried to watch WALL-E again later and it just didn’t happen. The whole trashed Earth was a little too much for me to accept. A bit too much propaganda for me.

I just finished “Meet the Robinson’s.” It took three times to get through it. Not from the beginning three times but I watched it in parts. A little last night, then some more this morning, after watching a very good tennis match. Then I finished after work.

I found it interesting that his motto was “Keep Moving Forward.” Where my heart had taught me to always keep going forward, which has benefited me many times. Times when I would have preferred to not go to work because the journey had exhausted me but I just went so I could keep going forward.

It seems I have shed the mask. It was a strange feeling at first. I still have the impulse to put my mask on when I come back from break or lunch at work. It had become a habit.

The first thing I noticed was my allergies returning. The first day I sneezed a lot at work. Then it settled down some but I still feel it. The allergens are very high right now anyway. It’s feels good to take it off and feel a bit more normal again. Many people continue to wear their masks, either because they haven’t gotten the vaccine or can’t get the vaccine because of health reasons or they simply want to be safe. It is way to hot for me and the mask was making me miserable at work. I’m only a couple of days from being fully vaccinated two weeks after my second dose.

After all that I was going through with trying to get new brakes for my bike, the saga continued yesterday. I had ordered something from another company and it was left in the mail hub just fine. So I figured it must be fixed. I then ordered the brakes for the third time, along with a bottom bracket for my bike as that is going out now also. I figure I will just take a couple of hours tomorrow and do some good maintenance on my bike for Summer.

Well, I received a notification yesterday that the package with the brakes had been delivered but it didn’t say way. I didn’t receive a number for the hub so I could pick it up. I just shook my head and figured that I’m expecting to receive the bottom bracket tomorrow, along with some Tulsi powder, of which I’m trying a different company. I hope it is good. It’s hard to find good Tulsi powder for some reason. So if they deliver those and give me a number for the hub then the other package will also come out with that number.

Today I received a number for the hub for that package that was received yesterday. Then I received another number. I figured that was the lost brakes that I never received before. When I contacted Amazon to get a credit they said to just keep them if they come.

Well, I now have two set of brakes. I will now replace both front and back. There is something to just being patient and going through the process. I really think that this is my heart testing me in some way. Not so much a test but to show me how things can work if you just let go of them and let them form on their own rather than getting upset and causing a scene, feeling terrible because of anger and frustration. Things have a way of working themselves out on their own.

I did chat with the automated chat yesterday, just to say that I didn’t receive it. But then left it at that. I felt it was good to at least let them know in case I didn’t receive them at all.

These are all part of the many changes I’ve been experiencing. Like at work, where I just let most things go. I have a person stocking my department now who just loves to, well, mess things up. I just pass them by until I need to fix them. I did mention it to my immediate manager and he is going to talk with her. What she is doing is a bit extreme. I think she is getting back at me for pointing out that I don’t want her doing those things.

But, who knows? I don’t read situations all that well so I just mentioned it to my manager who seemed to understand that she isn’t the best at what she does. I think it’s because she has been doing it for nearly 20 years. Lifers are the worst simply because, as they get to that time, they get bitter. Just go through the motions to put in their time.

It’s seems we’re entered the second round at the French Open. I downloaded the app so I can keep up on what is going on. At first I allowed the notification but then they sent me the score of a match and I don’t want to know the score that way because maybe I want to watch the match. The app is good if I just want to know the score without watching it.

Serena Williams has made it passed the second round. All her matches so far have been long. She has been playing players with very low ratings and still having to struggle through. I wish she would just win, tie Margaret Court’s record for grand slam wins and then retire. It seems she isn’t going to go away until then, even though she does look old out there and out of breath a lot.

Venus Williams was beaten badly in the first round. There are a lot of very good players coming up since they both disappeared. Maybe it was because they disappeared that many of them got more court time. I don’t know but it’s wonderful to see.

My entire view of life is changing. I’m watching the cynicism nearly disappear. I just go with in anymore. In a way, this is what my heart has been telling me all along. There is nothing I can do to save or help humanity. She has shown me that all the trash and everything that humans are leaving about in the world doesn’t matter. Once they are gone nature will simply recycle it. It might become the fuel for some civilization of beings millions of years from now.

Life goes on. The main thing is to understand the insignificance of humanity. They are just one of billions, even trillions of beings in the universe. As a life form, as a whole life form or species organism within the ecosystem of the whole they are important. All life is important. No life is more important that any other life.

So my heart has been trying to teach me to just let it go. Let humanity run it’s course, as she has told me over and over again. Nothing I do will change this. Even sacrificing for any of it doesn’t change anything. Just let it go and live within it as it is. I will only be here for a short time, just as any human. So don’t worry about it. Life is much grander than the 70 to 100 years that a human usually lives.

Well, I’m again just going along for the ride on this very new journey. A journey that is basically returning me back to being my “normal” self, just without all the burdens that I felt before the journey. As some changes come, some that I’ve tried before the journey and they didn’t work, she tells me that things will be different this time as they come into being.

The most important thing is to just let them form naturally, in their own time. Be patient and let it all just happen. Much like how I was rewarded with two sets of brakes simply be allowing it to happen in it’s own time.