A Different View

It was a warm day but it wasn’t as nice as the forecast made it seem to be. It was cloudy and windy all day as a storm is expected to come in tomorrow night. The wind is supposed to increase tomorrow.

Last week I was sitting outside and I saw what seemed to be space debris enter the atmosphere. It was a large glow that slowly diminished until it disappeared. It didn’t pass across the sky but simply glowed brightly and then disappeared. Then I saw that there was a meteor shower that was coming to a climax last week. It didn’t seem like a meteor as they travel across the sky but it would define what I saw more than human space debris. All in all, it was interesting to see whatever it was.

Last week I wrote about how I was seeing humans in their raw, animal form, such as women being merely a flower that men felt an instinctual attraction toward for sex and continuation of the species.

Today I was given another view. As with all experiences, it simply happened seemingly out of nowhere. I have been looking for new music to listen to. Just as with movies and literature, I have particular tastes. With music, one of those things is that I only listen to music written and performed by women.

In the past, I had no real luck. I have a very long play list of female artists so I’m not lacking in music to listen to, but I still keep exploring. I had come to a point where I didn’t think there was anymore music for me.

For a little difference, today I went off to listen to Meg Myers. I enjoy her passionate expression of love in the negative. Her expression seems to express a sort of frustration that some women have in their romantic experiences but often express them more passively. She expresses it more aggressively which is somewhat refreshing and real for me to experience.

I’ve listened to her music before and have looked at the suggested music that comes up when I do listen to her music. I have found a few female artists performing what I call, dark pop, which I enjoy. Such as Feist and Banks. Nothing much other than these.

Today there were many new artists that appeared. It as like a smorgasbord of new music for me to explore. I wondered where all of these artists were before.

So I spent many hours exploring new music. I’ve often said that women should stay out of heavy metal and post grunge because what I’ve seen is not all that good. I actually found a female heavy metal artist that I enjoyed very much. Very intelligent lyrics, unlike the sort of hair band, 80s type heavy metal I’ve experience from many other female artists.

Sometimes I miss heavier music but I don’t enjoy listening to the male contribution to heavy music so I don’t listen to it. It was nice to create a new play list for heavier music from female artists to enjoy at times. I don’t enjoy heavy music all the time but there are times when I have a craving for it.

On and on I went exploring all of this new music for me. All along I kept wondering where it was before when I was searching. It wasn’t all new music in general, having been out there for many years.

After several hours I noticed something. I wasn’t viewing these women in any way as flowers. I was seeing them purely as the beings they are. I noticed that this perspective moved into everything I watched about women. I actually enjoyed this as I was able to see them in another raw way, not as physical beings but the beings within their physical beings, without any feelings of sexual attraction getting in the way.

I would say that in the past I would view women about 80% as their beings and still about 20% or so with sexual attraction, which always frustrated me in ways, getting in the way of how I truly wanted to experience women, but simply accepted it as a natural thing.

As I thought about this, it came to me that most men, if they didn’t have that natural magnetism, would probably ignore women in general. I thought about the rights that women have are still conditional on the men and the men could take them away at any time. They also give these rights to simply satiate the women, yet they still control women in many ways, mostly because their dominance over them somewhat ensures their sexual desires will be filled.

Men portray themselves in ways where they seem to be above this animal magnetism, but get them alone, even very religious people, and sexual attraction comes to the forefront, though they don’t like to admit. It is sort of repressed but it is such a powerful instinct that it can’t be fully repressed.

I’ve always been in awe by the creativity of women. Here I was, able to focus solely on their creativity. I will say that I spent a lot of times with tears in my eyes as I experienced their true beauty without any distractions of the animal involved.

Of course, it all came to an end with a long period of listening to Agnes Obel, who I admire very much. I got to wondering if she too has Asperger’s, as her music is perfect for what I seek in music. A perfect blend of light and dark, simple melodies complexly interwoven together, that, well, brings me to tears because of the beauty. It was so wonderful to experience her from this perspective. I came to admire her, as well as the other women I listened to today, even more. But still thought about how most men wouldn’t admire them in the same way, especially if they didn’t have the magnetism to attract their attention to them.

I thought about how important the creativity of women is to this society. A society that is desperately lacking in creativity. What they call creativity is usually merely technology. Technology continues to progress exponentially, but it is primarily masculine influenced, which is seen by the constant attempts to bring women into STEM.

Yet, I think there is a reason why more women are interested in STEM. It lacks creativity. As Alan Watts stated about creativity, the greatest creativity is that which is spontaneous. Lately I’ve experienced much creativity in women that very much seems to be spontaneous. It simply comes from their being, their everyday expressions.

Today I also watched a performance of a female ice skater. It was so beautiful and it completely took me in, losing all sense of space and time around me, which is rare for ice skating. At the end, lacking the crowd applause because of Covid, I could see that she would score very high. It was then that I thought, “It’s too bad that she did all of this simply for a competition, to be better than others. Rather than for the sake of expression alone.”

But would she push herself to this point without the competition? Maybe she would if competition didn’t exist in the first place. But most people within the Capitalist perspective say that this competition is what causes people to perform at their best. That it stimulates creativity. Yet she was simply doing it to satisfy the criteria of the performance that was given to her and she patterned her performance to these criteria. What would it have been if there was no criteria. Again, in their perspective, it would be uncivilized and even chaotic.

Well, I guess we might never know, at least until humanity in it’s current state is destroyed.

I could go on and on about all the other experiences that have come from this greater perspective that I’ve been enjoying. In some ways, it’s why I couldn’t come to write before this, as there was so much coming in I had no idea of where to start, nor even an image to begin with. It wasn’t until I realized this wonderful experience of finding all of this new music was really a gift from the universe to expand my perspective beyond the animal and into the higher realms of viewing women as they truly are within them.